:: Closing Time ::

:: Thursday, August 15, 2002 ::

It dawned on me just now as I re-thought a tell all, in the final days before most of you leave and the more important final days before I leave, that I only have a couple of questions to answer off the top of my head.

That's not much of an "all," is it?

So the reality became clear - I've got a whole lot to tell, but it's not that structured. I'm not sure what I want to say because more importantly I don't know what I think people should hear. I know what -I- want certain people to hear, and I'll probably tell that. But I don't know what people want to know.

So tell me. Tell me tell me tell me. Email me. (if that link's no good for you, talon@gwu.edu)

I want to know, so I can tell you. I'm not promising any answers to any specific questions: I'm just promising to answer as many as I can. And I don't need to know who you are; I'd like to, but that's just my own curiousity. It's more important that I answer the questions that other people want answered, about myself, my feelings, and my reality. Use a fake email address if you want, or a secret one, or ask somebody else to forward the question or something. Just get it to me.

That's what this blog is for, at least now. It used to be about my just rambling about going off to college, and closing out this section of my life. Then I realized.... that most of you don't know my life for what it is, and worse most of you think that it's something it's not. As honestly as I've tried to live these past few years I've failed to portray myself for who I am - I failed myself, I failed those around me. So this blog has become some kind of a way for me to try and jump all the way up the ladder, and see how many rungs I can clear in very, very little time. I've had to make two months of blogging make up for 18 years of judgement.

To some extent, I think I've succeeded.

In the next two weeks, we'll know for sure, make or break. Yes, I now have officially less than 2 weeks.

If you jump for the second rung, it's easy to hit, and easy to catch. If you jump for the tenth you'll often miss it, but you have a chance of catching the eighth, or the sixth on the way down, but it gets harder. Sometimes you even make the tenth.

I'm jumping for 20. Chris DeSantis may remember what happened when I jumped for four - I missed, and it was bad. I've got longer arms now though, and stronger legs. Mixing metaphor and reality? Metaphors are reality, at least in the surreality that is my mind and my blog. I think I've got good readers, you can handle it.

Don't forget. Tell me what you want to know.
:: Peter 4:20 AM [+] ::
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